The Blogcademy Awards (The Bloscars!) With a Giveaway Prize!


photo (14)C’mon, admit it.  You just knew you’d find me with this Blog title today, right?  With my love of inventing Blogger Vocabularly (read here) and how I honored the Winter Olympics with “The Writer Olympics” (read here) and Super Bowl Sunday (read here) then it follows there must be an event called “The Bloscars.”

Now let’s walk the Red-Carpet and enter the actual Post to see the grandeur that awaits, shall we?  Beware of the Blogarazzi with their blinding camera flashes, whoops and hollers.  Smile nicely, with that odd, “look over your shoulder at who-the-hell-knows what” type of pose.  Maybe all bloggers should keep looking over their shoulder for the next odd thing to happen to them?photo-217

 THE PRE-CEREMONY TIME WASTERS & A PRIZE!

Welcome! First of all – – instead of Ellen Degeneres and pizza, you’re stuck with me serving Blogdogs on Buns. Children Bloggers get CornBlogs.  Sorry.  I won’t pass a hat around for $ contributions, but please don’t blog one single word about how I didn’t take into account alternative meal options for Blegetarians and Blegans.  We like our blogs meaty here!  i.e. – – “Where’s the Beef  Blog ??”

photo-216Insert your Favorite Opening Dance Sequence Here to the left.  Idina Menzel (pronounce it however you like, but give John Travolta a break- – he’s barely “Staying Alive” since his Saturday Night Fever stint) can also sing “Let It Go” from the animated film, Frozen, which is what happens to Bloggers who refresh their Stats page too much.  Our computer freezes.

And yes, just like last year with Ellen hosting, there will be a Selfie Photo Contest, so let’s take down Twitter…Wordpress!  Not to place any WordPressure on you, but please take a photo of the front page of your Blog the way that it looks on your laptop/computer with you (the proud Blog creator!)  in the photo as well.  Shy, retiring, inhibited, insecure, and/or paranoid Bloggers (that would be me) feel free to just portray your blog alone, without any human in the pic.   Put a link to your photo (Shutterfly, Facebook, any other forum where you can post a picture) in the comments section and the winner (based on the most eye-catching, creative photo) will receive two movie passes. (or the equivalent of such, on a $25 Amazon Gift Card)  Deadline will be this Friday Feb 27th  to post Selfie photos and a winner will be picked and prize awarded on my birthday, March 12th.  Since I will have nothing better to do on that day, other than to sob about not being in my 40’s any longer.

And Now . . . The Blotion Picture Blogcademy Proudly Presents . . . THE BLOSCARS! (think of orchestra rising here)

During the silence that follows each category,  please imagine who would deserve this particular award in your own real life world or Online world that you call your Blogosphere.  I would never be so presumptuous as to start naming Names here!  The idea is to get YOU thinking about the kinds of people (bloggers and non-bloggers alike) that you consciously surround yourself with each and every day.  It CAN make a difference.photo-218

And the Featured Categories Are ????

Best Supportive Commenter:  Who regularly leaves you lots of love?

Best Editor:  Which individual do you count on to give your posts a onceover, so you don’t have blatant errors like “onceover” when published?

Best Original Score UnderScore: (Note: Strikeovers would also fall in this category)

Best Blog Header:  Your eye was drawn immediately!

Best Blog Background:  It compliments, rather than detracts.

Best Song: (Oh!  I feel another contest coming on!)  In the comments section below, please leave the one best song (with either a Title or the well known chorus lyrics) that would best suit your blog.  In other words, you would most want to have this song blasting when someone clicks open your blog.  Give a brief explanation as to why you chose this song. One winner will be announced (same dates given for the Selfie Photo contest above) and awarded a $20 itune Gift Card.  We’re looking again for Creativity here and some Wordplay.  Here’s a not so good Example:  The song “Roar” by Katy Perry should accompany my blog because people always roar with laughter when they read it!

Best Tagger:  Who gets the best traffic from tags?

Best Muse:  Who inspires your ideas?  Which individual do you most find yourself telling to “hold that thought” for a second while you jot something down in your “Blog Notebook”  You do have one of those, right?!?

Best Brusher-Off-er:  Who (in real life) changes the subject the fastest when you bring up your Blog?

Best and Worse Dressed List

Clothing is a huge deal.  I know.  Just not here. And breasts are not going to be mentioned here at all.  If you want to know why, go here.   So alternatively,  there will be no hiring Mr.Blackwell  Blogwell to ogle (blogle) and rave or conversely rant/diss any certain Blogger’sPajamas Attire – – but the following categories will rhyme with the word “Dressed” instead.  You should nod your head right about now and see this as a perfectly “suit”able solution.

Best Jest:  Favorite Non-Serious Blog

Best Guest:  Who regularly has the most interesting Blogger Guests writing for them?

Best Blessed:  Whose Blog seems to have the most Gratitude or Grace?

Best Addressed:  Who takes a Controversial Subject and Nails it?

Best Confessed:  Who takes the opportunity of blogging to bare their soul, show their authentic truth?

Best Assessed:  Who is the Best Reviewer you know.  Books, Movies, Food, etc. Their opinion matters to you!

Best Compressed:  Who can blog in the fewest words you know and still make it work?  Really distill down their ideas so you just get the concentrated bottom line from them?

Best Distressed & Stressed:  Who is always having an issue?  Yes, this could be a Drama Blog, but maybe not?

Best Obsessed:  Who focuses on just one topic every single solitary time, but you love them anyway?

Best Cardiac Arrest:  Who shocks you the most with their outrageousness?

Best Nest:  Which Parent Blogger gets the most “oohs and ahs” because their love of family shines through?

Best Quest:  Who seems to have the loftiest goal or purpose in Blogging?

Best Teenage Blogger who is wise beyond their years:  Hey that doesn’t rhyme?  That’s right, just seeing if you are paying attention.

Best Contest:  Who regularly has Blog Giveaways that excite you?

Best Pest:  Who is that Blogger you wish you could secretly Unfollow?

Best Rest:  Their Blog is where you hang out when you want to unwind and relax.

Best Pressed:  They haven’t been Freshly Pressed, but you think that’s just a matter of time. Either that or they make really good freshly squeezed orange juice.

Best Detest:  Okay, you hate their blog.  You don’t follow it at all, but you’re aware of its presence and you want them to clean up their act.

Best Intelligence Test:  Wow, are they just off the chart smart or what??  Do you even belong there as a reader?  Yep, you do!

Best Request:  They’re the Blog-Pleasers.  They will do what you ask because they want crowd approval.  But do you really know what they’re about?

Best Impressed: They are the equivalent of the  Name   Blog-Dropper who wants you to admire their Blog for the Flash, not the substance.

Best Protest:  They are never going to be happy unless they can keep blogging about how unhappy the world makes them.

Best Mae West:  “Why don’t you come up and see me sometime?”  That’s right, I finally ran out of rhymes that had any connection to blogging! And besides we needed a real movie star right about now.

Along with leaving a comment, Please don’t forget to enter one or both contests above (Selfie & Song) and we’ll see you next year at the BLOSCARS! Also signing up to follow my blog will guarantee you won’t miss the next time I get zany enough to decide to bizarrely tie a Giveaway Contest with a Posting Topic.

29 thoughts on “The Blogcademy Awards (The Bloscars!) With a Giveaway Prize!”

  1. Pingback: Come to a Commercial Character Cocktail Convention! | Once Upon Your Prime

  2. Wow Steph! I need to look at this when I’m up for it, caught a cold over the weekend. So much to digest in one serving. Too much good stuff. Song “As we poison pigeons in the park” by Tom Lehrer dear prof. UCSC. Maybe because it’s so absurd, or just because. Although there is perhaps a seed of truth to it, they are not the only birds of a feather you know. Also his “We’ll all go together when we go” kinda self-explanatory. Well off to find drugs, I mean nyquil.

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  3. Brilliantly funny. Since I do not own a Shelby I had to take a picture of the neighbors. Then I realized, silly me, I misread it. So here is the link to my Shelfie http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/dog-selfie.jpg
    It is perfectly clear to me that you are having people submit all these categories for content on your next blog. Best and worst dressed. Then it occurred to, what if I blog naked? I hear that tends to free you up a bit. Please send the gift cards, all of them, to Blogs on Fire at male drop 10 or just call me at 8675-309. You are so creative to come up with these fun contests.

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  4. It would be super fun to attend this in real life with you as the witty host! I won’t say anything about the categories you wrote cos I’m actually scared of belonging to one of the sad ones (and by sad I mean pathetic). So for the song…hmm….let me think….perhaps Jason Mraz’s ‘Remedy’. My blog is full of angst and plain worries that I think the reader needs a strong positive theme song before getting carried away with my troubles. There’s nothing like a great pick me up song to shield you from my overthinking, hehehehe!

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  5. I almost missed this post. I was practicing my smile for when the camera shows my face as the announce someone else won in my category.
    The same smile I use when the categories are announced and I realize I’m not nominated.
    That’s ok. I have my Freshly pressed award to comfort me. Oh wait….nevermind.
    Funny post. 🙂

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  6. Wow. This is quite a post and of course hilariously done. This is some great stuff trying to get people out of their comfort zones and into the blogosphere on a much more personal level! Can’t wait to see how it all comes up!

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  7. When it comes to blogging I’m the Cat’s Pajamas
    And they call me the Rock N’ Roll Supermama
    Cynical sarcastic subtle and sublime
    And I got it in the pocket with the fattest rhymes
    And if you haven’t got it yet, this is my song
    With a guitar and a beat you’ll be singing along
    So I know the Bloscar will go to me
    Cause I got it when it comes to originality
    And you know i got credentials, I come highly recommended
    So thanks for the iTunes gift card, I’ll just tell you where to send it.

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  8. I came here to accept for Mr EL BROOKMAN ….My name is Sarah Buffalo Toe Woman of the Yogapants Tribe. I represent all the Toe Women and am here to disrupt this Blogcademy Awards ….. Unfortunately Mr EL didn’t win squat or get any kind of mention at all. He told Carly Camel Toe Woman he was so brilliant that he was sure to get several awards and our Yogapants tribe could use this forum to accept his awards and protest. Wait till I tell Karen Kangaroo Knuckle about this embarrassment

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  9. Hi …. My name is Sarah Buffalo Toe Woman from the Yogapants Tribe….EL Brookman let me use his account to come here to your blogcademy and accept his award and use this forum to protest the treatment against Women Toe Tribes everywhere….including the Camel , Sloth , Baboon , Elephant and Racoon Toe Tribes….. Unfortunately I do not see he was awarded anything. He thought he was gonna get a big award and a dinner cause he told us he’s brilliant …. Well , this doesn’t help our movement any. He’s no Marlon Brando.

    Sarah Buffalo toe Woman

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    • Belfie !! Lol, sounds like I have bats in the belfry, which I do….but is besides the point in the wake of your wonderfully creative submission!!! And thank you for tipping your ever so creative hat back in my direction! You’ve gone above and beyond your Bunkie duties!

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  11. Well you certainly have nailed the ‘Best Muse’ category for me, I have written posts inspired by your blog. I might even do an Oscars one!!
    The song that sums up my blog is (Make Me Smile) Come Up and See Me, by Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel.

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  12. Being a Virgo and a natural worrier, I have a number of worries for the Oscars tonight.
    #1 Gee, I wouldn’t be seen dead with that hairdo. ‘Course I don’t have hair so that is kinda obvious.
    #2 That dress is going to fall off if she is not careful. Please don’t let it fall off. Please…please. On second thought, please let it fall. I really want to see if she wears Victoria Secret.
    #3 What if that star has to go to the bathroom. I recently found out that they have people who will go to the bathroom for them.
    #4 Who is going to clean that carpet? What if one of the walkers has gum on the bottom of their shoes?
    #5 Who has to clean all those windows?
    #6 What if Neil Patrick Harris gets up there and his zipper is unzipped? (I have heard that there is a very resourceful entrepreneur who started a company called Zipper to the Stars. The zippers have an app. All the star has to do is press the app on his smartphone. The smartphone sends a gps signal to Zipper Central. Zipper Central sends a signal to the zipper and wallah. It is my understanding that the company will be releasing a retail model for all us mere mortals.)
    #7 Do stars sweat like everybody else? If they do, the auditorium people must use up a lot of Glade.
    #8 What if a star is forcing to sit with a star they are having an affair with?
    #9 How are they all going to find their cars?
    #10 Do we really like them?

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  13. Has it really been a year since your last Blogcademy Awards? Your humor makes time fly!

    I’m hurrying to get in the “Like” line before the stampede who wants front-row seats. So, while I dress the stage and build costumes (authentic theater lingo) for my Selfie, here are my nominations:

    You, my dear, are the winner in all categories.

    Header: I’m missing your signature feather boa header, but the cake is sweet.

    Muse: You inspire me to have great fun adding comments to your posts.

    Yes, even Best Nest applies to you. Your affection for your family, and theirs for you, shines through your most sarcastic claims.

    And you are the best Teenage Blogger because you are younger than me, and I’m only 20…on another planet.

    Pest? Yes. When I’m concentrating on something, and a notice comes in stating that you posted to your blog…

    I suppose that even winners must lose sometimes, so you must do better if you want to win Brush-off-er and Guest.

    Pressed? What do your psychics say about another one this year? I’m sure you’re not just preparing lemonade, though you do great things with your lemons.

    My recommendation for your blog song is “Let It Go” as I cheer you on to let out all your zaniness, as well as all of the other parts of your personality, especially the controversial ones. Besides, you made me a fan of that song, nearly a year ago when I trusted you as Reviewer.

    I can’t find any way to get Detest to fit you. You are the Mae West Star of The Best!

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    • Oh Grace– as every nominee SHOULD be at this moment, I am completely speech-less. Thank you ever so much. You like me, you really …. Oh nevermind. Yes it’s been a year since you last submitted your unforgettable (cue Nat King Cole) creative Blog selfie for my contest! And really? You want my feathers back? No allergies to goose down? alright well, the award for Blog with the most Grace surely goes to you. that category was made with you in mind. And speaking of – my recent “Rose by any other name” post also has a section for you!” See you on the after party circuit where we’ll feast on Everything in honor of the Theory of Everything!

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