Many people believe in reincarnation, even taking things a step further by claiming that the same individuals go round and round in groups, staying bonded together for the duration of many lifetimes. I just finished reading the book Many Lives, Many Masters by Dr. Brian Weiss which also confirms that souls travel as a clan to the other side and back again, making sure to stay in the same family. But I have to wonder if they take turns being the black sheep.

Joking aside, apparently they do change up their relationships with each other — even their genders. And hold onto your hat for this next one — they can change species too!

So, are you getting this? This means you and your spouse may have been brother and sister or a parent and child in a previous life!  After realizing all the possibilities, I incredulously put down Dr. Weiss’ book to carefully scrutinize my own family members with brand new (and suspicious!) eyes.

My eldest girl DOES slightly resemble my beloved grandmother who was always so kind and gentle to me. Could it just be their shared DNA or did my grandma actually return as my own daughter so we’d stay connected? It’s definitely not good for me, but all these years I’ve been mourning her death.

I peek into my daughter’s room to observe her sleeping, tangled up in her blankets. (Is that you, Nana?) I lean over and cheerfully whisper into her ear, “Good morning!”

“It’s definitely NOT good morning mourning for me!” she retorts. I freeze. Wow. Just wow. That is utterly amazing! Of course this may have something to do with her not being a morning person.

“I miss homemade chicken noodle soup,” I continue hopefully. “How about you make a pot today?”

“Go away! It’s Sunday so I get to sleep in! Cook your own stupid soup!” my daughter shouts, throwing a pillow at my head. I guess that could be considered borderline nurturing.

After a few more hours pass, I have another idea. Nana loved to knit and even made me a few special pieces I’ve kept to this day.

“What do you think of this sweater?” I ask as my daughter combs her long auburn hair. Nana had reddish hair too! I look into her eyes for any sign of recognition.

“Oh no, you don’t. You’re not handing that ugly thing down to me. If you want to wear old-fashioned stuff like that, that’s your business. But I recommend putting it in your next garage sale!” Okay, so she’s not my elderly, sweet Nana – she’s just a 17-year-old spoiled, ungrateful brat.

Moving on to the more fascinating concept of species switcheroos, I stare at my parrot and coo, “Does Auntie Pauline wanna cracker??” as the bird swings on his little trapeze and tilts his head curiously at me. Or even better . . . maybe my ex-husband is actually my long lost childhood dog named Elvis? After all, he’s always hounding me and occasionally he’ll wear blue suede shoes.

But then something even stranger happens. I loan the book to my sister who somehow becomes convinced that her first husband Jeffrey, a drunk who died of liver disease, has come back as my youngest son.

“That’s absurd,” I tell her on the phone. “Hold on a sec, the kids are arguing over who gets to wear an old sheet for Halloween.”

Me:  C’mon, you can be a mummy. Let your siblings be Ghosts.

Son:  But I’ll miss all the boos!

My Sister: (shouting from inside my cellphone) “Go back to Alcoholics Anonymous, Jeffrey!”

Maybe there really is something to all this reincarnation stuff after all.

So what about me?? Who was I before I was me? I definitely hope I wasn’t any of our crazy relatives that I’ve heard about through the years. Maybe there are other possibilities? I consult the index of the book and find a section called, “Celebrities who come back as ordinary people.” That’s it….I’ve always known that diamonds ARE a girl’s best friend.

When my ex-husband comes to the door to pick up our kids, I swivel my hips and breathily sing, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President!” His bewildered reaction? “Uh…. way to go, Marilyn.”

“Thanks, Elvis!” I respond. Then he howls and scratches his fleas.

Do you believe in reincarnation? If so, do you have any proof?