Tag Archives: Reincarnation

Reincarnation Realization!

no reincarnationMany people believe in reincarnation, even taking things a step further by claiming that the same individuals go round and round in groups, staying bonded together for the duration of many lifetimes. I just finished reading the book Many Lives, Many Masters by Dr. Brian Weiss which also confirms that souls travel as a clan to the other side and back again, making sure to stay in the same family. But I have to wonder if they take turns being the black sheep.

Joking aside, apparently they do change up their relationships with each other — even their genders. And hold onto your hat for this next one — they can change species too!

So, are you getting this? This means you and your spouse may have been brother and sister or a parent and child in a previous life!  After realizing all the possibilities, I incredulously put down Dr. Weiss’ book to carefully scrutinize my own family members with brand new (and suspicious!) eyes.

My eldest girl DOES slightly resemble my beloved grandmother who was always so kind and gentle to me. Could it just be their shared DNA or did my grandma actually return as my own daughter so we’d stay connected? It’s definitely not good for me, but all these years I’ve been mourning her death.

I peek into my daughter’s room to observe her sleeping, tangled up in her blankets. (Is that you, Nana?) I lean over and cheerfully whisper into her ear, “Good morning!”

“It’s definitely NOT good morning mourning for me!” she retorts. I freeze. Wow. Just wow. That is utterly amazing! Of course this may have something to do with her not being a morning person.

“I miss homemade chicken noodle soup,” I continue hopefully. “How about you make a pot today?”

“Go away! It’s Sunday so I get to sleep in! Cook your own stupid soup!” my daughter shouts, throwing a pillow at my head. I guess that could be considered borderline nurturing.

After a few more hours pass, I have another idea. Nana loved to knit and even made me a few special pieces I’ve kept to this day.

“What do you think of this sweater?” I ask as my daughter combs her long auburn hair. Nana had reddish hair too! I look into her eyes for any sign of recognition.

“Oh no, you don’t. You’re not handing that ugly thing down to me. If you want to wear old-fashioned stuff like that, that’s your business. But I recommend putting it in your next garage sale!” Okay, so she’s not my elderly, sweet Nana – she’s just a 17-year-old spoiled, ungrateful brat.

Moving on to the more fascinating concept of species switcheroos, I stare at my parrot and coo, “Does Auntie Pauline wanna cracker??” as the bird swings on his little trapeze and tilts his head curiously at me. Or even better . . . maybe my ex-husband is actually my long lost childhood dog named Elvis? After all, he’s always hounding me and occasionally he’ll wear blue suede shoes.

But then something even stranger happens. I loan the book to my sister who somehow becomes convinced that her first husband Jeffrey, a drunk who died of liver disease, has come back as my youngest son.

“That’s absurd,” I tell her on the phone. “Hold on a sec, the kids are arguing over who gets to wear an old sheet for Halloween.”

Me:  C’mon, you can be a mummy. Let your siblings be Ghosts.

Son:  But I’ll miss all the boos!

My Sister: (shouting from inside my cellphone) “Go back to Alcoholics Anonymous, Jeffrey!”

Maybe there really is something to all this reincarnation stuff after all.

So what about me?? Who was I before I was me? I definitely hope I wasn’t any of our crazy relatives that I’ve heard about through the years. Maybe there are other possibilities? I consult the index of the book and find a section called, “Celebrities who come back as ordinary people.” That’s it….I’ve always known that diamonds ARE a girl’s best friend.

When my ex-husband comes to the door to pick up our kids, I swivel my hips and breathily sing, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President!” His bewildered reaction? “Uh…. way to go, Marilyn.”

“Thanks, Elvis!” I respond. Then he howls and scratches his fleas.

Do you believe in reincarnation? If so, do you have any proof?

The Past Survives from my Vast Lives!

photo-61“Aren’t you curious about some of the unusual things you do?” asked my wacky friend Tiffany last week. (This is the same friend who convinced me to see the Psychic Channeler!)

“Curious?  No.  Entertained?  Yes!”  I hoped that would shut her up because I just knew where this was going.

“Come with me to a therapist who does Past Life Regression.”

“So I can find out the reason I’m afraid of spiders is because I used to be a fly?  No thank you.”

“Please?  She’s offering a great ‘Two for One’ special!”

“Two past lives for one current death?”

“Very funny – – No, she’ll see the both of us for one price.”photo 1-17

I won’t tell you whether or not I went with Tiffany, but here are some connections that seem more than a tad coincidental….

Little Miss Menopause’s Phobias, Quirks & Obsessions Finally Explained!

  •  I don’t like people’s pity and constantly try to cheer others up —  I used to be Eva Peron and sang, “Don’t Cry For Me, Argentina” on a daily basis.
  • I dislike playing tag in a swimming pool and get headaches from all the yelling. — I was the girlfriend of Marco Polo.
  • I like to post interesting quotes on my Facebook page and I save all my fortune cookie slips — In 530 BC, I used to be a Scribe for Confucius. I was the one who wrote “Confucius say:” on everything and then added my own interesting advice, like, “If your mother is cold, then wear a sweater for goodness sake!”
  • My favorite meal has always been an Orange Julius with a Caesar Salad.  Wait for it…. yes that’s correct, I WAS Cleopatra.  And Elizabeth Taylor really did get me down pat.
  •  I constantly tell my children to speak up because I cannot hear them. — I was Charlie Chaplin’s mother.
  • When we’re out of cereal, milk, or eggs for breakfast and my kids are starving, (eying the Betty Crocker boxes) I reluctantly will “let them eat cake.” —  I was Marie Antoinette.
  • When lecturing my daughters, instead of saying, “Go to your room this minute, Young Ladies!” I say, “Now listen here, Little Women!”  I was Louisa May Alcott.
  • I don’t use profanity or swear.  My biggest cuss word is saying, “Oh shoot.  Shoot, Shoot, Shoot!”  –  I was Annie Oakley.
  • I made sure to buy all four of my sons their first pair of suede dress shoes, in a lovely shade of blue.  — I was Elvis Presley’s Mom.

You may have guessed by now that I did in fact explore my past lives.  The most interesting thing was each time I was hypnotized and awakened, the first thing I was asked was to look down at my feet and describe what I was wearing. This told a lot about the time and place. Sandals?  An Egyptian slave.  Pointed high heeled boots?  A Victorian Maid.  The last life I was regressed to, I reported wearing these…

Were these even my size?

Were these even my size?

 

Could it be??  Nah.  Although I do have an aversion to hot-air balloons and green make-up.

Now if you want to know who you were in a past life, you don’t have to hang out with my friend Tiffany, you can just click right HERE and tell me in the comment section.